RED LASER RECORDS Novedades

Irlam's dastardly duo are back with another bonza bucket of bass, breaks and badness as they fire up Studio Krust for another high octane session.
Sure to top the Fairground charts and further enrage the Hell's Angels, 'Synthetic Stupidity' sees the pair unleash their full force unabashed, as they hit a purple patch full of new found and frankly quite surprising productivity (rumours of a European-wide sputnik shortage are the likely catalyst).

Fractionally distilling their many collective years of dance music experience into 12 refined pieces of advanced club kinetics that skirt between the syncopated intricacies of breakbeat science and maxed-out 4/4 propulsion.
More hyped-up vox & frantic sampling, more tension, tons of one-finger keyboard melodies, and - as usual - moments of sonic tomfoolery to flummox the assumers.
With their drug debts paid off and a forced clarity of mind, 'Synthetic Stupidity' is a more expansive, deeper and unhurried project; allowing Bosco and Metrodome the space and time to truly deliver the zenith of their sound.

This, is DJ ABSOLUTELY SHIT!!!

This is a super limited double vinyl only press.

Twelve Il Bosco edits of new wave bangers tried and tested down in the Manctalo Disko at The White Hotel and beyond...

No digital will be sold. Again as we said plenty of times before the reason we don't sell the digital tracks is out of respect for the original artists. We make no money on pressing vinyl.

It's expensive. time consuming and nobody fukin buys it anymore.
We do it because we love this shit and the chance to share our discoveries with ya'll.
We hope our compilations serve as an advert for the original artists.
You fall in love with a track, find out who it is and then go and discover more about them.

Shouts here to Hysteric (Mothball Records) for track 3 and Kelvin Andrews & Balearic Mike (Down To The Sea And Back) for putting me onto Car Crash Set leading me to discover track 1.

Red Laser Records switches on the smoke machine and strobe light, dishes out the high grade poppers and continues with the most unprofessional approach in the biz as they celebrate their FIFTIETH fuckin' release - a double disc photon torpedo diving into the label's roster and featuring all new tracks from RL stalwarts across the ages.

Marking this half century milestone, their in-house graphics team have been on a strict diet of kryptonite and engine oil, conjuring up one of the most lavish (and budget destroying) gatefold sleeves to date; alongside personal insights (and an in-depth cigar review) on their 13 year journey from label heads Il Bosco and Pharaoh Brunson.

Eight, sizzling, white hot MANCTALO jams that'll have knickers dropped, shirts lifted, fists pumping and your room stinking of fried circuit boards quicker than you can say #inabiteveryoneelse.

Before we pack away the poppers for another year, let Red Laser take you for one last spin on the waltzers.
Tried and tested at our recent road block parties in Manchester, these edits shine a light on four primo-grade Italo face melters. Fervently excavated by Bosco over countless visits to Bel Paese and streamlined for the hydrofoil, with some extra added calories for the club.

Opener 'Destiny' tweaks and shudders under analogue arpeggios, dazzling Strat chops and cosmic bass interplay before dropping into a simply glorious female vocal that, thankfully, gets plenty of airtime before Bosco calls close. A track so close to perfection we had to make it longer.
'Flavio', up next - and half sung in Italian so we only know a bit of what she's on about - is another supreme slice of Italo disco from the upper echelons that Bosco snaffled between glugs of Barolo and a face full of worm cheese. Sure to instigate group hugs, 4AM declarations of love, tears of happiness and huge pelvic thrusts dependant on environment and inebriation.

The tingles continue on side B with another supernova burning bright across the stars. 'Newsin' introduces itself with a joyous marriage of marimba and synth before yet another vocal proves Italians really do, do it better when it comes to writing some of the catchiest hooks and choruses in the universe.
'Lace', featuring the record's only male vocal appearance, has a romantic, proto-goth-new-wave vibe; like if Robert Smith and Richard Butler had a chem-sex love child after a wild night in Baia Degli Angeli.

Not sure who the woman in lace is, but we'd defo like to see her down The White Hotel one night...

Red Laser continue their prolific purple patch, unpacking four more slabs of red lit Manctolo from a host of box jammers, old and new.

Frank Butters wastes no time at all, 'The Call Of The Wild' engaging photon tubes with a highly kinetic array of crystalline synth shards, thunderous bass and hyperactive sfx. Without geeking out too much, special mention has to go out to the synthesis on display here - Butters advancing up the levels of sonic shamanism as he conjures up never-before-heard patches of interstellar cosmic NRG...

Bob Swans' 'Bodyform4U' unites the robots with a universal message of togetherness. Its multiple layers of shuddering arpeggios and star-aligned synths working in unison to quell any fears and send us off into a space age utopia. One that'll work as well soundtracking the end of the session as it will as the dancefloor's filling up; its subtle anthemic qualities sure to rouse the spirits of even the most dehumanized cyborgs.

New signing Lone Saxon drops 'Hypersleep' which utilises rich piano chords and a hefty breakbeat, switching up the vibe but keeping things super uplifting. This one reminds us of that innocent period when you could get on the megabus for 50p and score three for a tenner on the dancefloor. An evocative vocal refrain adds a moment of thoughtful introspection in between the e-rushes and arm-raising for another moment of interactive harmony.

Finally, 'Webo' sees Franz Scala (with a little help from Il Bosco) return to source, delivering a bona fide slice of maximum balls out MANCTALO chug. With tension-wrought chord progressions, delicious layers of lead melodies and a soaring vocal, there's few that can resist the charms of this late night electro-disco hyper anthem.

All aboard the starship !

RL x

Red Laser gets on a kinky tip, where poppers are currency and salacious activities mandatory as label chief Il Bosco grabs us by the nethers and heads for 'The Darkroom EP'.

Inspired by amyl-soaked tales of Euro basement sex club debauchery, and steadily edging its way to a never-ending climax, the EP is a highly charged exercise in x-rated synth-jizz and erotic Manctalo that'll have you quickly believing you're surrounded by massive pulsating dicks on a cocktail of GHB and Mkat.
Maintaining a persistent throb throughout, the EP has us reaching blindly through clouds of pink saturated club smoke, unsure of what our sweat-soaked hands will grasp on to.

Two remixes alongside three originals. Fabrizio Mammarella has the blood rushing to our head quicker than a whiff of Rush Black Label* on his mix of 'Notio Botherdini'. Adding extra acid for a trippier sexperience and urging willing participants to "close your eyes" as he achieves maximum thrust.

Meanwhile local Stretford poppers enthusiast** Bob Swans also has a fumble in the shadows, remixing 'Dark Room' with late late late on in the session in mind - a time of carnal lucidity and primal urges that'd make even Michael Barrymore's peculiar desires look vanilla. It's a sparse and special redux, fluffing us with that latexy bassline and never-ended sfx trails until we're quite literally cumming in your ears.
Apologies, that probably was a bit graphic.

*Poppers brand highly endorsed by Red Laser contributor Count Van Delicious

**Red Laser only hypothesizes to said producer’s poppers usage.

It's the one all the massive have been waiting for! Part 2 of the Salford sage - DJ Absolutely Shit's 'Memoirs Of A Crust Monster'. More hyped up tear outs, soundsystem ruffage, and bass 'n breaks love songs from our Hell's Angel-dodging beat freak.

Kicking things off with glowing neons and super-charged subs is 'Higher', a modern jungle monster decorated with classic hip-hop samples and a well known diva vox squealing through the melee.
A serious 'watch your bassbins' track - RL HQ have safety tested this on the most robust car stereo systems and so far have yet to avoid any cabinet damage - proceed with caution!

'Lost In Space' rolls outta the speaker stacks with a b-boy swagger and loose breaks. A tribute to classic breakdance electro galvanized with Ab Shit's intricate trademark production chops. You'll want to crack out your finest red Puma classics and a slick tracksuit for this one.

Onto 'Out On Love' and between you and me, someone needs to call the social service for samples - as it's unlikely you'll ever witness a more blatant case of sample molestation. Squeezing every last drop out of a catchy piano lick, TV snippet and drum break; the track really does highlight the unrivaled programming prowess of our Irlam renegade who's taken SP1000 trickery to its absolute zenith.

'Money Talks' sees our cheeky ragamuffin dictate a life affirming sunrise over Pomona - pre-gentrification of course; a thousand smiles and memories of old Mancunia shimmering in the early morning industrial haze. And an abject slight at those who put profits above people - another poignant ode to our changing cityscape driven by the most addictive boogie-based groove and clattering Linn drums.

Spine-tingles and fanny flutters guaranteed ALL DAY on this one cru!
Look out for the full 16 track album due on C90 cassette and digi download coming very soon...

RL x

Irlam's infamous upstarts DJ Absolutely Shit are at it again with four more tracks to rattle yer spines and rupture yer spleens.
Utilizing the classic approach of sourcing a sick sample, adding a rugged breakbeat, then tweaking out the buzz for maximum enjoyment, the pair deliver an explosive EP of global hypercoloured mayhem that burns hotter than an oz of 'Ells Angels sputnik.

'Bridge To Your Heart' grabs Sade by the hand, shoves two purple doves down her throat and queue-jumps to the front of Bowlers for an endorphin-rushing hardcore workout full of modern beat engineering and sample manipulation.

Switching approach, 'Bolivia' shuns the dreamy feminism for an altogether more masculine affair - roping in the Wu for an argy-bargy, elbows-out speaker shaker full of hi-definition laser stabs and destructive, land mine subs.

Hitting the accelerator, 'Rocking You Eternally' traverses the jungle boarders in a blacked out Nova, Ab Shit's flair and panache at drum programming and contemporary production chops beautifully on show throughout this big system roller with a carp-hunting vocal hook.

'Gong' closes off proceedings, merging moods inna more seductive flavour. E-soaked pianos and a gentle throb coaxing us to that end-of-night climax that'll have us humming the piano line all the way down the M65 home.

No jokes cru, this is some of the best tackle to emerge outta the DJ Absolutely Shit studio to date. One of two, vinyl-only EPs and ahead of their debut album that follows on C90 tape.

Boing boing boing, boing boing boing, boing boing!!

As the fable goes: pre-discogs, intrepid disc jocks would often take trips to Italy (many tricking their spouse into believe it was a ‘holiday’!) to source records from the seemingly endless supply of top tier Italo, disco and cosmic record shops across the country. According to legend, the classified sections of local yellow pages and information booklets which would contain the addresses of the record shops and dealers in the area would often be ripped out unscrupulously, thwarting – or at least making it more difficult for – the next vinyl tourist to source out the rare gems amongst the rich seams – a wild west vinyl gold rush if you will.

Such stories are a rarity these days, with youtube making some of the most underground tracks common knowledge, and discogs almost making any record obtainable – at a price of course. Upgrading his digging methodology, Bosco has developed a secret New Technique to side-step the machine and in doing so obtained a clutch of amyl-soaked fluffers that are so rare, that upon writing they aren’t even listed online! Seriously, he must be communicating with some interdimensional, upper echelon Italo overlords; taking us on a primo-thrust tour through the most unexposed recesses of the Italo disco galaxy.

Don’t be hoodwinked by their sheer obscurity however; we wouldn’t give a toss if they couldn’t tear the arse off the dancefloor. But they’re all fuckin rhodium grade tackle peeps! Eight neon-drenched late night roman candles of Italo disco decadence that’ll defo have you jizzing rainbow skittles over the dancefloor as you search desperately through the fog for another huff of poppers off Darren.

Total Discogs market value: as yet undetermined

Pharoah Brunson’s Pyramid Points: 9999999999999

Ok here we go again boogie nuts!
The fourth volume of Full Beam's infamous "For Gees Only" series is finally upon us...

Another 8 nuggets from the depths of Pharaoh Brunson's pyramid suite presented in a super fresh screen printed gatefold sleeve...

You know the drill by now. One press - Vinyl Only - No digital - No tracklist - No sound clips - No problemo !

Strictly for radio and DJ use only.

Red Laser Corp.

Il Bosco's cousin from Irlam is back on Red Laser.

Three bangers and one weirdo track.
VERY LIMITED - so sort ya widge and get on it. INABITEVERYONEELSE!

repressed !

***Taken from Leaked Whatsapp messages between DJ Absolutely Shit and Il Bosco***

Yo cousin Bosco...how's ya raisin widge?

Nice one for that last lot of dough i'm starting to well buzz off all this music industry bollocks now you know...mad what you can do with a catchy DJ name and pure absolutely mega tunes wot are miles better than anyone elses init?

Anyway i've been diggin' me fuckin' 'ed off ant I recently and got some more well primo gear for yas here...done 8 this time - was thinking if i'm managing to sort me life out banging out EPs for yas - if I do and album or two i'll be mega wedged in no time deffo init.

Yeah i'm thinking fuck this i need to get out this rank shit-hole quicktime... spotted this sick 3 bed thatched cottage gaff in Cadishead the other day, well smart. Detached n everything G, so can deffo get a proper grow on in there piece of piss. Gran's doin me ed in n all here G, big style the old slapper. She keeps robbin' me cash!
Turn me back for 5 mins and she's fuckin chonged it all the little turd... fuckin fuming ta fuck g cant wait to do one from that shitty flat...and if she thinks she's keeping me dodgy sky box she suck me widge haha.

Anyway shout me soon init. fuck knows what to call this album g. ask Pharaoh to come up with a name for it the turd. i can't be arsed thinkin... Seen him the other day actually bumped into him and that Crispy Duck guy who does those sick comics. They was outside some posh coffee gaff in Ancoats with a few other chumps lobbing bricks at a pile of other bricks down near the canal drinking pink hooch the turds. Get em to do the artwork for it n all g. if they want paying or owt tell 'em to suck me widge haha.

Nice one

Emerging when humanity needs him most, and currently adopting the body of a 60 odd-year old carpenter with a penchant for animation and Red Stripe; Terry Perace teams up with Red Laser's own Pharaoh Brunson to form a new perpetual EP series.
The Peraceamid project begins with EP 1. 4 x Hyper-ancient, super-hi-tek audio tools for us Earth dwellers to utilise, corrupting RL's standard "Manctalo" vigour with abandan.

(A1 - Terry Perace - Trip Pop 2020)
Perace himself, ditching the Carpenter attire and hardwiring himself straight into basic circuitry, conjures up skeletal, repetitive reduxes, born outta the oldest primordial gloop, churning together into embryonic life form rhythms that have now existed since the earliest signals of dual-cell organisms on our planet.

(A2 - Kid Machine S.D.M (Terry Perace's InSlaved mix)
Terry sparkles his Martian magic across Kid Machine's S.D.M from the 2020 'Magico' LP. An already high Manctalo watermark now given further accreditation by the highest Elders of Ancient Egypt which Terry confers with on the regular. Welcome to the top of the pyramid gee!

(B1 - Marcus Paulson - Wrecked in Utrecht)
The elusive Marcus Paulson we so far know very little about other than that he's an unconfirmed UFO enthusiast from Warrington...Terry received 'Wrecked In Utrecht' when he accidentally plugged a random USB drive into his earhole (he's not that up on our basic tech yet) in Pharaoh's studio at Hidden. An otherworldly Manctalo vortex and a holographic, plasma-soaked acid track designed to provide a cross-planetary bridge to raves and free parties on Cygnus.

(B2 - Ste Spandex - Examples of You)
Terry's been warmly applying his cosmic voodoo on Red Laser veteran Ste Spandex, nudging him further into the inter dimensional discipline of sonic energy manipulation, the fruits of which are a hyper-driven re-vamp of a '98, Earth-based club classic which he blasts into 5D thru the galvanised circuitry of his palladium-boosted studio.

Licensed and published by Red Laser Records here on Earth. First volume in a perpetual series...

As we emerge into the Now with a fresh perspective and renewed vigour, Red Laser Records usher in a novel epoch of Manctalo movements for our post-COVID enjoyment.

Entrusting piloting duties to four well decorated RL commandos, the EP serves to remind us all that despite everything that's happened, we can still find solace in red lasers, smoke machines and high-powered strobe lights.

Splitting open the collective dancefloor inertia is Kid Machine's 'Only Machines Allowed'.

A cybernetic b-boy jam straight outta the planet MEGOH circa 4044. Guided by electrified vocoder lines and a plutonium-grade, armoured groove this impenetrable battle rocket should issue the much needed power boost to get your body kinetics firing again when they release the e-barriers to hedonism.

Returning star fleet lieutenant Count Van Delicious has been collecting entities from the outer galaxies since his appearance on RL EP 9 ('Dark Fruit' w/ Senor Chugger).
Here he announces his return with an end-credits epic, an #inabiteveryoneelse theme from this young vet on a pants-off permo-buzz, up-scrolling through technicolored c64 visuals and deploying his now trademark zoopa-arps, euphoric synth stabs and thunderous low end shudder to deadly effect.

Meanwhile, Ste Spandex continues his cybernetic realignment surgery, dissecting a well circulated disco meme and adding voluptuous gender-neutral enhancements that'll be getting the next generation of androids frisky, despite their lack of reproductive organs. Fizzling synths, spherical repetition and a multi-dimensional mix of high voltage rhythms leaving that vocal line permanently downloaded in your memory cloud. No sharing necessary.

Scottish deep space observer Ernesto Harmon provides some cosmic ruggedness to close off our mission. Reinforced & galvanised low-end rhymix coalescing with humanoid synth expression and an infinite, carbon-free energy source keeping momentum plateaued through the morning after the night before. There's no off switch baby!

For astral travellers seeking solace in the new Now, EP12 kindly acts as an upgrade to your possibly dormant dancing system as you stumble out into the new nocturnal environment. Hopefully reminding us that the simple act of moving alongside one another in a pitch black, laser-guided club space hasn't changed that much...

Limited press, with artwork which could be the next top selling NFT, we urge our RL family to bag this collectable chronicle from the Red Laser Corp.

Yes geeeees... the third instalment of our Full Beam! For Gees Only series is nearly upon us... We've got a few very sneaky test pressings offa the back of Pharaoh Brunson's hydrofoil shhhhh...

Yous know the drill... no tracklist... no soundclips... just 8 mega boogie BANGERSSSS!!!!!!!

As a New Era beckons globally, Manchester’s primo Manctalo merchants – Red Laser Records – quietly unveil their latest clutch of specialist space-age kinetics. A fifth-kind encounter enabling users to bridge the continuum of dance & interaction between our Earth-dwelling selves and the inter-dimensional overlords.

Containing three brand new movements in machine music from our treasured production stable of Kid Machine, Bob SwanS and Il Bosco; it also houses an honorary appearance from revered Danish spearhead Flemming Dalum, who serves up a particle-splitting redux of a lesser-known proto-techno nugget from Belgium. Dalum’s been traversing the star-clusters on his own intrepid missions for a while, so we’re mega buzzed to have him back on the RL mothership.

Stretford based synthesizer technician, Bob SwanS has been drafted in specifically by RL head Il Bosco for his advanced skills on the patch bays. “Aphelion Run Theme”, the point of which an object’s orbit is furthest from the Sun, vividly detailing in sound the journey our collective consciousness must undergo in order to reach the Highest Elders. We highly recommend utilising this track alongside Dr. Greer’s outstanding work with extra terrestrials.

KID Machine’s celebratory, vocoder-led Manctalo message: “It’s The K.I.D” is a sonic motif to our interplanetary relatives; this cybernetic b-boy’s way of spray painting the Red Laser logo over Proxima Centauri B’s subway network in neon-blue, pyroxene paint.

Bosco lets loose with one of his most impassioned creations to date too. “We Almost Lost Oddbins” previously titled: “Save Our Scene”, a universe-wide cry for help recorded when worldwide limitations on dancing and human co-exchange were at their most aggressive; its nonetheless positive outlook inviting us all to look both inward and outward for solutions in the New Normal.

Encased within a striking monolith art print, depicting the mystic energies of ancient galaxies it heralds the now widely-accepted belief that we are in no way alone in this universe and that channels of communication between more advanced civilisations than ours have already begun…

Inner space centurion and local star command operative Tommy Walker III returns with a new mission directive this DATE...
Hardwiring to the Red Laser network and initiating an advanced, beta-tested programme of futuro-manctalo cybernetics, TWIII's meta-level hybridisation of Italian synth disco & northern English rave styles, combined with an expert deciphering of modernised club dynamics has resulted in a faultless system capable of withstanding the most extreme sonic test environments. RL30's eight tracks are RL Corp. operation-certified to work alongside Human2.0's electrostatic discharge profile. Universally approved usage for sentient earth dwellers offering portals into dancefloor ecstasy and inter-dimensional transcendence. This programme begins with 'Pocsy', and sees euphoric holograms burst through galloping Italo mechanics, fusing retro-tinged optimism with a nu-age release. 'Shoiab' (named after a fellow starship captain tasked to MCR and in alliance with RL Corp...) unleashes red shifted synths and carnal cowbells for the cyberotic lap-dancers to get jizzy too. 'Autopilot' allows the on-board crew to reassemble, a well automated array of arpeggios guiding the shuttle during the first phase, until reconsolidating in the latter stages for full-on interdimensional 5-D funk jam. 'Lightwork' is pure RL endorsed synth-jizz, erupting out of Tommy's arsenal like a mis-timed giant alien cumshot; minus any Manga references.
'Astral Projectile Vomit' address a common problem endemic to protectors of our star cluster; then channels a shiny, serpentine chrome sequence and thrusts it down the rainbow road for maximum belly aches.
More hydraulic collisions between electronic disc-boogie and newly mined atomic particles from passing asteroids ensures Srg. Walker has enough mainroom material to keep the Sharons and Traceys of the main hub dancing in between injections of dimethyltryptamine. Closing with a trio of humanoid hits that'll have Jonny5 ordering kryptonite margaritas for the entire ship, Tommy Walker celebrates with the cosmic conge, 'Gary Blast'.
RL Corp is confident RL30's internal algorithm is a future-proofed, cross-species platform for auditory excitement, and will continue to stimulate listeners across a multitude of environments.

It's been a while since Red Laser's last release which left a void in the UK output of Manctalo synth jams but now a planned schedule of three releases in quick succession means plenty more analogue chug for you to rattle your bones to.
First of the 3 is this unique double gatefold LP from Red Laser original Kid Machine.Kid Machine delivers a 5 star upgrade to the signature sound that people worldwide have fallen in love with. 808 kicks and DX 7 licks bubble under the atmospheric chord changes creating a soundtrack which is just as comfortable on the dance floor as it is on a midnight drive.Alien Dance darts around to irregular delight. The dramatic score of Asteroids builds until it soars high above the grid. The bassline on Beast drills a blackened dance floor in preparation to be replaced with 80's discotheque neon squares.Beyond Cygnus takes flight and drifts across a Martian plane. The 808 kicks and orchestral synth stabs of Conquest crush all known reality into a space the size of a photon and the weight of its gravity is unbeatable. Standing out amongst the pack is the apply titled 'Forever Machine'.
A proper Manctalo synth anthem guaranteed to deliver speaker destruction.The LP closes with classic Machine style bangers 'Flight Manoeuvres' and 'Seconds From Oblivion'.
They bring this galactic odyssey to a confident end. This is a cracking journey through the outer rim and back.